Why Are We Meeting, Really?
Have you ever walked into a meeting ready to move something forward
—and realized halfway that you were just there to talk about it?
Everyone contributes.
Questions get answered.
Next steps are mentioned.
And still — a week later,
nothing has actually changed.
It’s not just you, it’ s a pattern that organizations naturally drift into as they grow and face complexity.
Let’s unpack this dynamic together.
In the previous blog post, I wrote about how bad meetings pull people’s attention away from actual work.
This post is about the organizational dynamics underneath.
The kind that shape the choices that people get to make in the first place.
Because meeting overload is not random.
That’s why it keeps happening — across teams, across organizations, across industries.
What We Think Meetings Are
When a new meeting appears, we assume it exists for a reason.
That people are bringing their time, attention, and energy together because something needs to move.
Implicitly, we expect:
the topic matters
the right people are there
something can be decided
something will move forward
We treat the meeting as a working moment.
Not where work begins or mostly happens —but where individual work actually turns into group coordination.
→ Where perspectives meet
→ Where direction becomes clearer
→ Where the next step is unlocked
And when it works, you can feel it immediately.
people are engaged
the conversation has weight
the questions are precise
decisions can be made
ownership is clear
disagreement moves things forward
People aren’t just talking about the work.
They are in it.
They ask: “How do we actually make this happen?”
“What is my part in this?”
That’s when something shifts.
And when something also continues after the meeting.
Because when the conversation in the meeting is real,
people leave with something solid to continue building on.
Clarity on what happens next.
Clarity on what others are contributing
Clarity on how things fit together overall
That’s when a meeting actually creates momentum.
But that’s not what most meetings look like over time.
Why Meetings Stop Moving Work Forward
Instead what meetings often become is what Brené Brown calls a near enemy.
Something that resembles the real thing closely enough to stand in for it
while actually undermining it.
In this case, meetings start to stand in for progress.
They create a moment where something can be seen.
People gather.
The topic is discussed.
Attention is placed on it.
From the outside, it looks like good progress.
But in practice, something else is happening.
Meetings begin to exist for their own sake —driven by calendars, hierarchy, and performance management.
You start to see patterns like:
Signaling — “The topic is on the calendar for next week.”
Risk management — “We did talk about it during the meeting.”
Covering hierarchy — “This was requested.”
Buying time — “Let’s revisit this later.”
Avoiding decisions — “Let’s take this offline.”
Not because something needs to move —
but because it needs to look like it is moving.
And this is where the shift happens.
Work starts to look busy — without actually moving.
Why This Pattern Keeps Repeating
When people are overwhelmed, they try to protect their energy and attention.
They narrow their focus.
They disengage slightly.
They stick to what feels manageable.
It’s a natural response — one that shapes how people show up at work more broadly which I explored in more details in this blog post.
When organizations are overwhelmed, they do something different.
They try to create stability by optimizing coordination.
Organizations need to:
Keep things aligned → Moving too quickly creates risk
Make sure the right people are involved → Moving without alignment creates expensive rework and decrease credibility
Prevent premature decisions → Too much change, too fast, creates instability.
So the system does something very effective:
It creates places where things can be discussed without requiring that they move.
Over time, this settles into a stable state.
Not because it is nice.
But because it’s manageable for everyone.
Meetings that don’t require too much attention,
don’t force decisions,
don’t create too much follow-up…
don’t require the whole system to move at once…
They are manageable for individuals.
And controllable for the organization.
→They are easy to attend.
→ Easy to repeat.
→ Easy to absorb into the system.
A meeting becomes a place where work is held.
Not moved.
Not blocked either.
Closing
Most teams don’t decide to work this way.
They drift into it.
Because the same dynamics that create the problem also shape how people try to solve it.
So teams try to respond the way they know how :
More meetings.
More coordination.
More discussion.
Which creates more overwhelm,
more busyness,
and even less energy to actually move the work.
That’s where facilitation comes in to break the cycle.
Momentum can be built back through a series of facilitated sessions that help teams reconnect with a sense of rhythm.
Work that moves.
That stacks.
That continues.
Not just progress —
but sustained progress over time.
So the team doesn’t just solve something once.
They recognize:
“This is how we want to get work done.”
If this resonates, you can explore our Momentum offer specifically designed to support this shift.
